Parents often find themselves in a difficult position, trying to distinguish between being supportive and overbearing during the college search and application process. These tips aim to keep the peace at home and relieve some relationship stress.

• Choose a time once a week to discuss how the college search is going. Limiting college discussions to a set time eases student and parent stress during the remainder of the week. 

• Let your child know that you understand the college admissions experience is far different than it was a generation ago, and try to avoid making comparisons.

• Try to avoid using words like “safety” or “backup” to describe a college. Using words like “likely” or “strong targets” gives a more positive spin to schools with higher admissions outcomes that are still an excellent fit for your child.

• Understand need-based financial aid and merit aid.

• Gather financial information and complete the FAFSA and CSS profile. 

• Use the Net Price Calculators on college websites to gauge the cost of attendance at any college on your child’s list

• Read everything your high school guidance department shares regarding their college application process.

• Become acquainted with Naviance, Scoir, Xello, or the particular program your high school counseling department uses

• Help plan college visits by taking a look at your family schedule. School breaks are a good time to tour campuses. Begin to turn the details of planning the visit over to your child by asking them to:

• Register for tours and information sessions

• Deciding where you will eat on campus

• Finding out where the admissions building and visitor parking lots are located

• After a visit, send a thank you email to admissions or the tour guide (if appropriate)

• Assist with recalling activities that should be included on the resume or activities list 

• Talk up your child’s best qualities that they may want to highlight in their essays

• Respect your child’s privacy by limiting discussions about applications, grades, and test scores to your immediate family.

Helpful Resources

Various resources covering financial aid, college research, virtual tours, and test prep websites can be found on my Resources page.